Even ‘˜hot chicks’ fail to attract men

John Sandeman

"I went to a church the other day and saw a lot of hot chicks" was casually aimed at me across the news desk recently. "It made me think that if you want to get a hot chick maybe you should become a Christian." 

And the follow-up: "There were a lot a of hot chicks with ugly guys. Really ugly guys".

(This is guaranteed real dialogue. And no, I won't say which church my work colleague was talking about.)

When I told the story to another workmate (from the other side of town) he said, "Hot chicks. The church is full of them. I keep telling my single friends to become a Christian".

So it's not just one suburb.

The minister of the first church, which has a young congregation, has noticed a big swing from a slight male surplus in his congregation to a majority of women in the last few years as his church has grown. He doesn't know why.

Normally a good supply of women can be relied upon to attract a crowd of blokes. That's why sleazy nightclubs let girls in for free.

But why doesn't this work for church? Why the female surplus?

The pewsitter is unafraid to opine.

As a good Calvinist he thinks it might just be that God has predestined more women than men to eternal life. Maybe he likes hot chicks.

Or maybe there is something about church that attracts more women than men.

Leaving doctrine to those better trained in it, the pewsitter is concentrating on this second theory.

A common idea is that church is feminised, with singing and a focus on relationships more attractive to women than men. But there are some male aspects to church.

Hands up if you think our all-male leadership is blokey? Thought so.

In the latest Briefing magazine, Colin Marshall writes: "We should start with the people God has given us .and equip them for ministry accordingly".

I think his point extends to ordinary pewsitting blokes with giving them something to do key to having more of them around.

Because us blokes aren't as good as women in forming friendships and community, we need tasks to get us interested. And that is why many blokes are more likely to be lonely than women. Church is just part of a societal pattern at this point.

It is especially odd that the "complementarians" around us - those who consider that men are the natural leaders of church and family - don't make more room for guys to do things. The normal role for most guys at church is pretty passive.

Ministers stepping back from property decisions and treasurer functions would seem to be an obvious way to make room for guys. But many ministers want to be hands-on. 

The best way to attract Alpha males might be not being one yourself.

Feel free to regard my theory as baloney. But work out your own theory about the bloke absence, please.

Because when 'hot chicks' can't get blokes to church, we are in trouble.