“You’re a priest?”
“Well, Anglican minister actually...”
The fear flickered through her eyes before she could hide it. Would her child be safe with me as his soccer coach?
It was another reminder of the terrible name the church has for many people. The sexual abuse of children within the church has left many deeply scarred. Where churches have covered up this evil, protecting the institution and forgetting the victim, the damage is even greater. Why would anyone want to identify with an institution like the church where it does appalling evil. Sadly, the behaviour of Christians - individually and corporate - undermines the plausibility of the Gospel.
I preached on this topic recently. What can we say to victims and to those that love them?
Acknowledge that terrible sins have been committed. Christian workers have not always acted as they should in protecting the vulnerable. We need to grasp the horror of what was done to children. Don’t defend the indefencible.
Listen to the victims. Give them the space to tell their stories.
Say sorry - we of all people should know something of repentance. This is not a place for defensiveness or denial or blame shifting. Help them find healing and justice where that is possible.
We must never forget what has happened in the past or be so naiive to think it could not happen again. We must be vigilant to make our churches safe. Diocesan policies of zero tolerance for misconduct and abuse are meaningless unless they are implemented at the local parish.
Take it very very seriously. How seriously? I think of Jesus’ words in Mark 9: “If anyone causes one of these little ones—those who believe in me—to stumble, it would be better for them to have a large millstone hung around their neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea.” In Mark 10 we also read: “Let little children come to me and do not hinder them for the Kingdom of God belongs to such as these. I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the Kingdom of God like a little child will never enter into it. And he took the children in his arms, put his hands on them and blessed them.”
Tragically, some people have quite understandably responded to abuse by saying: ‘I can never believe in a God that would let this happen.’ Others will say: ‘I need God to help me through this.’ So while sexual abuse might give some personal reasons to reject belief, that needn’t be the case & certainly isn’t always. We mustn’t tell victims how they should feel as a victim of abuse. What we can do is do everything we can to see it doesn’t happen again, and do what we can to seek justice now.
The Anglican Abuse Report Line is 1800 77 49 45. The website for the Professional Standards Unit which receives and deals with complaints of child abuse or sexual misconduct by members of the clergy and church workers is here.
