When I started university, my older sister encouraged me to come along to some Bible talks and to the campus Christian group’s mid-year conference.
I was not interested. However, my parents said, “You should go; it will get you out of the house and stop you playing video games.” They paid for me to go. I remember not liking it – there was too much Bible study! I thought it was strange to give up my holidays to do more study.
There was a talk on the Cross, and at some point in that talk I recognised my own sin before God. It was a moment of clarity. I needed forgiveness in Jesus. God decided, by his Spirit, to open my eyes. I felt the weight of my sin, but also the significance of Jesus being able to wash me clean. That was the beginning point of my journey.
A key influence in my Christian faith was my university worker, Paul Grimmond. He was the one preaching when I became a Christian. I grew a lot under his ministry. He ended up training me as well when I did my ministry apprenticeship.
He would invite my wife and I to come over and have dinner with his family. That sticks in my mind. It was the first moment we just observed hospitality, and also, after the meal they did dinner devotionals with their kids. It was significant to observe how he lived and how he was in his family. We learned the importance of modelling the Christian life – those are the memories that stay with us for some reason!
Even during my time as an apprentice, there were times I thought, “Is ministry really what I want to do?” I had doubts. People identified that I was somewhat competent and I threw myself into running events, following people up and teaching the Bible. Yet there was still a part of me thinking, “Is this something I should be doing, or am I here because people said I should do it?”
I was looking for some sort of feeling to confirm what I definitely should be doing. I was looking for a feeling that wasn’t a realistic expectation. As I’ve gone on in ministry, I’m much more comfortable with how I feel. [Being in ministry] is something God has prepared me for.
At the end of the day, I really love people. I love that the gospel speaks to their deepest need. I can have a depth of relationship with people as we talk about who Jesus is. People are built for knowing God. The job I get to do, reading the Bible with people and talking about their faith, is the most satisfying work to be doing.
My prayer is that I would not be comfortable. I love my [current] role and my team, but I am praying that I would keep having costly conversations with my family and making costly decisions, if there is another place we could serve that would be beneficial. It’s a prayer for a broader vision of God’s work, around Sydney especially.
