By Jeremy Halcrow
Favourite comedy routines and live musical numbers have been just some of the extraordinary requests Sydney Anglican ministers have been asked to include in funeral services by grieving families over the past year, Southern Cross has discovered.
Is the trend to "personalise' funeral services something Christians should embrace for the sake of the gospel or resist, fleeing from the danger of syncretism?
Last month the Roman Catholic Church decided to tighten up what can happen during funerals because it believes the trend to "individualise' liturgy is leading to acts that conflict with Christian doctrine. Beer being tipped on the alter and eulogies which criticised Christianity were just two of a plethora of examples a report from the Church's National Liturgical Commission said was undermining the "solemnity' of the church service.
However, the Catholic decision " particularly its criticism of playing pop music at funerals and the placing on photos on coffins " sparked an angry public response on talk-back radio and in newspaper pages.
Many Aussies seem to find the stubbornness of a Church that resists all moves to become "relevant' utterly galling.
"For heaven sake, just tell Bishop Pell, "Get with it'!" was how one talk-back radio caller neatly summed up the sentiment.
Meanwhile Funeral Director Russ Allison is convinced the Church's position will give him more business.
"If the Church insists on depersonalising [funerals] and shifting focus away from celebrating life to celebrating the afterlife, rather than coupling the two together, I suspect it may well shift some marginal voters into using funeral parlours," he told ABC radio.
The Age articulated the Catholic Church's dilemma.
"The Catholic Church is, of course, absolutely within its rights to set limits on the order and style of funeral services conducted within its parishes," The Age editorial said. "But the Church's approach threatens to further alienate worshippers at a time when the institution is struggling to remain relevant to them. It must decide whether this is an issue that justifies such an outcome."
The Rev Michael Jensen, lecturer in Theology and Apologetics at Moore Theological College, says the public reaction to the Roman Catholic decision is revealing.
"Australians' long-standing suspicion of the authorities goes back to the convict era, but this attitude has been further emboldened by a post-modern belief that institutions have a hidden agenda to control us," he said.
Constant Mews, from Monash University's Centre for Studies in Religion and Theology, says she also detects a "simplistic anti-clericalism' in the ongoing drift towards civil ceremonies.(1) She argues that the media has played its part by exaggerating the extent of child abuse amongst clergy compared to other sectors of the community.
Around 40 per cent of Australian funerals are now conducted by civil celebrants, compared to half of weddings.
The boom in civil ceremonies can be traced back to the 1970s. In 1973, Attorney General Lionel Murphy initiated the Civil Marriage Celebrant Program in Australia. Before that time, civil ceremonies had been rare because there simply hadn't been many civil celebrants around.
Michael Jensen believes the growth of the "celebrant' industry and the trend towards personalising funerals is driven by our "culture of choice'.
"It is part of the individualism of our age and the logic of absorbing consumerist values," he said. "There is so much choice in every other aspect of our lives that it almost seems an outrage not to have choice in death."
He said the same phenomenon can be seen in contemporary weddings, but that the issue around funerals is more complex for Christians because of the sensitivity required when dealing with grieving relatives.
It should also not be forgotten that public attitudes to death change with every generation, and that Christians have been forced to adapt to these changes in the past.
The idea of the church funeral is a very recent phenomenon. Prior to WW1, a memorial service would be held in the dead person's home with a public Christian burial service held at the grave site. Only a funeral for a person of great significance " such as a State funeral " was reserved for a church.
This all changed with the social upheaval unleashed by WW1 and the Great Depression. The inter-war period saw not only a marked decline in Protestant church-going but a revival in Australian Roman Catholicism. The return of the mass to the centre of Catholic church life meant church funerals became more common.
At the same time, Australians became resistant to the idea of keeping dead bodies in their own homes for the memorial gathering. Some historians argue that the slaughter of young Australians on the killing fields of the Great War led to a "denial of death' in the 1920s and 1930s. The stark reminders of the dead favoured by the Victorian era were rejected. A funeral industry grew up to cater for Australian's desire to distance themselves from death, and it became common for a body to be "shown' in a funeral parlour rather than the home.
These two factors slowly saw the adoption of church funerals by Protestants. Yet the transition was not entirely smooth. Even as late as the 1950s, a request for a church funeral could raise eyebrows amongst some Protestants who saw it as a "Romanising' trend.
Today, elements of this "culture of choice in death' have been readily accepted by Christians. Cremation was once thought of as a pagan practice, but now 60 per cent of Australians will choose cremation over burial. In fact Australians are more likely to choose cremation than any other Western nation.
Key is that cremation is more flexible than burial " it allows the family an extraordinary amount of scope in choosing the "most appropriate' final resting place for their loved one. For a nation of migrants who feel rootless and detached from the traditional cultures of Europe or Asia, cremation allows the dead person to return to their "home country'. The ashes of my own Scottish grandfather were flown halfway round the world to be scattered on his beloved Arthur's Seat in Edinburgh.
Recently the Rev Garry Lee-Lindsay, chaplain at SCECGS Darlinghurst, conducted the funeral of an ex-student. She was in her mid-twenties, involved in the arts scene, and had long-sufferred with cancer.
"She knew that death was soon, so she had planned what she wanted, which was to make it a celebration," he said. "This included dancing and musical performances from family and friends " certainly not things usually associated with the traditional Christian funeral."
Garry was acutely aware of the danger that the funeral could become a performance and clash with the Christian service.
"I made it clear that my role was not to be a master of ceremony but to provide a spiritual and Christian framework to the event. The parents were very accepting of this and we worked hard to make it something that was both respectful to the family and also true to the Christian foundation of the school."
This family was far from alone. On more than once occasion, Garry has had his proposed service outline returned with a request to downplay the focus on Christianity.
"They'll say, "I like your service but can you take out the religious bits?'"
It is not surprising that school chaplains like Garry find themselves on the hard edge of this issue, says Michael Jensen, formerly a school chaplain himself.
"Young people tend to live for the present. Life is about doing what feels good now, while the future looks after itself," he said.
Confronted with the reality of death, the materialistic and hedonistic credo they have absorbed suddenly collapses. They are left struggling to make sense of mortality without any cultural reference points.
Garry Lee-Lindsay believes this is what is really behind the trend towards "individualising' funerals.
"When most young people come to organise a farewell for a departed friend or family member, there have no framework to make sense of what has happened, or even of life and death itself. All they are left with is a worldview which is driven by the character of the departed. They have nothing to work with but their memories of their loved one."
The other reason school chaplains are forced to grapple harder with this issue is the context of their ministry. Many parents see school chaplains as "employees' paid to serve their children's spiritual needs. This dynamic is very different for a parish minister.
Garry explains, "I am employed to serve the spiritual needs of the whole school community, which includes students, staff, parents, old girls and other connections. In general, I think it is far more difficult for a school chaplain to refuse a funeral than a parish minister because of the responsibilities that they have to the community and the different role that they play as far as ministry goes."
But this is far from a bad thing, adds Garry.
"I have seen great opportunity to provide comfort through the love of God and the hope that he provides in His Son, to people who may not ever approach a church or have a faith. Many times have people related how they didn't expect the "religious' aspect of the funeral service to speak to them so clearly."
A major concern raised by the Roman Catholic Church, is the post-modern trend towards "mix and matching' elements from different faiths. The claim is that people influenced by the New Age will take a bit of Christian mysticism and throw in some Judaism, add a pinch of Native American spirituality and wrap it in a Buddhist world-view.
However, Judy Watt, a non-Christian civil celebrant told ABC radio that this concern had been completely overblown, and that in her experience she never heard of any such ceremony.(2)
It appears what is more common is, say, a Greek-Australian or a Muslim-Australian wanting an Australian-style memorial that includes elements of the Greek Orthodox or Muslim ceremony. A traditional religious service for Greek Orthodox or Muslim believers is held at another time.
"In the ceremonies I've conducted, it is usually based on something in the heritage of the family," Judy Watt said.
Nevertheless, it is certainly true that more and more Australians are being influenced by eastern spirituality. Isn't there a danger that non-Christian ideas will sneak into the service through eulogies, songs and other unplanned moments?
Michael Jensen says that ministers just have to be prepared to do the hard work of talking to the families and ensuring the service is well planned (see tips box).
"The real problem with "individualising' funerals arises when God is marginalised and the dead person effectively becomes the centre of worship," Michael says. "I know of funerals where the sermon was followed with Sinatra's I did it my way."
Garry Lee-Lindsay agrees there has to be limits, emphasising that he "would not allow anything that would work against the message of the Bible'. But says he has never had to refuse to do a funeral because a family insisted on non-Christian elements being included.
"In making it clear that what I provide is a Christian funeral, I think the family would be the first to withdraw if they could not accept where I was coming from," he said.
We must also not forget that there is a healthy element to this attempt to "personalise' centuries-old rituals. Fans may have thought it was inappropriate that a church choir was at Slim Dusty's St Andrew's Cathedral State Funeral in 2003. Instead Slim's country songs formed part of the most extraordinary articulation of the gospel seen on live Australian TV in this generation.
"Deep down people are really just trying to find a meaning that is real to them in the church service " they want to connect with it," says Michael Jensen. "It is our job to help them understand the Christian meaning. Aussies do resist the stuffiness of tradition, and this is something that evangelical Christians can affirm."
E N D N O T E S
History research primarily from In the Midst of Life: The Australian response to death by Graeme Griffin and Des Tobin (Melbourne University Press)
1. "Rites of Passage' interview on the Religion Report, ABC radio, June 26, 2002
2. as above
