A friend of mine, Nicholas, recently moved into a new home, and joined the local Anglican church. He was properly welcomed, the people were friendly, and the teaching was good. Yet after about six months, he decided to leave. How come?

Very simply, he did not find community there. The people were warm, yes, but conversations at church never got beyond, “How was your week?” Bible study group was a great place to learn the scriptures, but not a good place to establish relationships. My friend found this deadening, and reluctantly left to seek a new spiritual home.

Nicholas is not alone - in fact, his experience is quite common. The word “congregation” literally means “a collection”, and sometimes our churches are little more than a collection of people. How do you turn a congregation into a community? My church has been struggling with this question for a while now.

We’ve concluded that a large part of the answer lies in our small group network. Pretty obvious, you might say. After all, every church claims that small groups are where fellowship really happens. Yes, the claim is made, but the reality often falls short. Lots of effort goes into making sure the bible studies are right, but how much effort goes into getting the fellowship right? It’s assumed that this will just happen by itself. Often it doesn’t.

How can we do better? I’ll share a few changes we have made, none of them revolutionary, but all pointing in the right direction.

First, we are now calling our small groups “community groups”. I wasn’t keen on the name at first, but it has grown on me. Labels really are very important. It doesn’t surprise me when “bible study groups” take on the character of a sterile tutorial. By contrast, “community group” sounds warm, suggesting connections and fellowship and friendship. It does make a difference.

As well, we are now having dinner together - every week. Yes, the logistics are challenging. But it really is worth it. There is something very special about sharing a meal with someone. You relax, you begin to feel good, and you start to open up. I reckon most groups would change for the better if they began eating a proper meal together, every week.

Another change involves serving as a community group. We are still taking baby steps here, but the idea is that ministry activities should be done by a community group, rather than by another group formed specially for that purpose.

There are some advantages to this. People enjoy ministry more, and are more committed to it, when they are doing it with their friends. As well, ministry tasks can be organised during regular community group time, which is a lot easier than trying to co-ordinate oh-no-not-another meeting during the week. And this whole approach involves less organisational overhead for the pastor. A practical example is distributing “The Essential Jesus”; we’ve divided our suburb into about 20 small areas, and assigned each one to a community group.

The natural desire for community is very strong, and I suspect more and more Christians, like my friend Nicholas, will not stay at churches that don’t have it. Just as importantly, outsiders will be drawn to churches that do have it.

Is community a priority at your church? Are you doing anything about it? Or are you happy to remain “just a congregation”?